10.19.2008

I was or maybe I still am, a 'deep' person. I like to think....as in think if things that im not suppose to. I don't know why but its becoming more of a habit. This is one of those times I was feeling rather 'deep' and spiritual. I wonder if you guys can get what I was trying to convey

REWIND 0.1

Mute

September 2nd, 2007 by yanzryo

I tried to look for the stars tonight….but I cant seem to find any…any of the ones I remember seeing. However…I know that they are there…hiding themselves from view….for maybe they are unable to glow as bright, Deemed to be in isolation.

The moon seemed bright…..its majaestic pressence, overshadowing any in the night sky….occasionally wraping itself underneath a blanket of clouds…or at times peeking through from the darkness, shy and unsure.

When was the last time we actually sit down and observe. Observe the wealth of creation surrounding us.Looking out for that favourite star we had since we were young….or the familiar smell of dusk when we open our eyes.We used to be amazed by so many things when we were young. By the first glimps of the morning sun…..till the ever blue eternal sky,painted with patches of white clouds or occasionlly decorated with ribbons of white.

As we grow older…..we forget all this things…is it complacency? is it ignorence? Slowly…one by one….the stars are hiding….intimidated by us…or even upset that no one seem to marvel at its beauty. The chirping of birds in the morning silenced by the rumbling engines and irritating honking of cars. The sweet melody of the rivers dampen by the noise we sometimes call music.

Mankind wanted to conquer the world…and they did. Like a plague sweeping across vast continents, uprooting anything in their path. Ironically….they wonder at times…what is their purpose in life. Some had the vision clear…while some vaguely remembers the idea in mind. At the instant we came out from the passage to this realm. The first breath of air…the first cry….what was it that we were told to do. As strangers held our frail body…as stange faces became familiar….did we try remembering the message we were to convey…or were we swept away by what this world has to offer.

This transitional realm…on borrowed time. Govern by its new human masters. We tend to be ignorant of this fact. That we are here for only a while. Restraint by ideals we ourselve create….restraint by ideas we ourselve create. Man wants the world.Being a tear drop in the vast ocean of tears….tears shed by the angels and the native beings before…are we blind? or do we choose to be blind….are we deaf or are do we choose to be deaf…but one thing we are not…is dat we are not mute.Words that are poisonous to us and the entities around. Words that drift us away from what we should do.We spoke……but unsure if its the ones we were suppose to be speaking of.

Gravity did ITS job in anchoring all of us to the ground….ITS amused by how proud man sounded when he claim dat he can deny IT. As man soar in his new found toys…how IT wish it has the power to not only ground Man physically…but also his swelling ego. To remind Man that they are like a grain of sand…whose destination is not in their power…whose destination is determined by the rivers or wind that moves it around.

I want to look at the stars again….I want to be enchanted once more by their beauty.I want to wake up from this nightmare. I want to no longer be deaf or blind. As I begin on this new path…not walking..but crawling in humility. Ashamed of the ignorance thats in me. Ashamed for being who I am, Ungrateful in every sense. As I crawl towards that beacon ahead…I will try to remember my best the message that im suppose to convey..the message that was entrusted. And when I reach the passage…greeted by hands alien to me….I hope to remember….

……I MUST.

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So..did you get it?

can`t you even see through me? `` Sunday, October 19, 2008

10.16.2008

I was looking at my previous entries from the various domains that I have and its hard to believe some of the things that I can come out with. Anyways I have decided to actually have a repost of the entries that I think is useful.

REWIND

DISCLAIMER: Past performance does not equate to future performance.
haven't you heard? People change.... :)

LOVE

July 16th, 2007 by yanzryo

LOVE…a four letter word that means nothing to some…but alot to others…….

Like respect, to get it or feel it, you must give it. Its something you have to show. By wat means…that is up to you and the person you love….

Ultimately, it has to be felt…for optimum results.

If you love someone alot…..show them you sincerely do…or even do stupid stuff for them. Do not be shocked if you do not get the same treatment in return. For to some, you do not have to show love to say that you love someone. Like I said before, for both to benefit from it, being mutual is the best.

For if both knows the extend of love each other has for each other, small problems can be settled, your mind wont get to the state of paranoia, simply state, love conquers all.

So think about it, when was the last time you told that special someone you really love him/her. not just by words, but by actions…which adds on to the sincerity. If you have not done so, try before its too late. Maybe just drop by his/her place with gifts, surprise him/her w a hug….you know…nice heart warming stuff.

Fuel. Things in life cant run long without ‘fuel’. like cars, we also need ‘fuel’ to work. nutritious food to fuel our strength to carry out various activities, challenging problems to fuel our minds to think and be alert, motivations to fuel our spirits….and what about love? Love also need that fuel.Sometimes..after years of marriage….couples tend to realise that their love for each other is declining.Why? that is because they take each other for granted. To think that being married itself is a life long pledge of love.Wrong.That is because, they fail to once in a while refuel their love, do something sweet for their partner, do that sacrifice once more as they did during courtship…dats the missing key.

If you believe that marriage is just a compromise between two people, than I am sad for you. True,compromise is important, thats where sacrifices lies.If there is no love to begin with, would you even get married in the first place? Im not talking about fix marriages. Im talking about love before marriage…the kind that most of us are looking for. But to get this, are you ready to give as well? theres no one way road here…theres always two.

Men by nature are tough in the emotions department. They may appear that they do not need to be shown love and stuff. However, the truth is, no matter how different both sexes are, we are both humans, born with a heart..with a capacity to feel. Maybe because of ego, it may appear that they do not want to be mushily treated. that doesnt mean you do not show them you love them. The key is occasionally. Occasionally show them you love them. For like women, we men also want to be loved. So, if you keep failing in relationships with man, think about it, have you been a good partner? Did you show your man what they mean to you..not juz verbally.

Women on the other hand…are very emotional. They need to be loved, to be secure. If you guy doesnt give you or show you that, be patient, look out for signs, hes sure to have done something nice to you…even how minute it is to you, for him its a great deal. over time…when hes comfortable, he will open more. However if he doesnt…maybe it is time to assess him on how much you really mean to him, or are you being taken on a ride (Spare Tyre)…till a better offer comes along

However, there are also guys who are very loving and passionate towards women. This I should say are the rare cases. However if you do come upon one, do not let him always be the one doing things…for sooner or later, if you do not comply to his feelings, then he may feel that hes the spare tyre. communicate. understand each other…show love to each other..

Show love to the person to the level that he/she shows love.I got this from someone. and i think it is very practical. If your partner keeps saying that they are helplessly romantic and stuff like that, do not be fooled into giving him/her what he/she wants…as in how he/she picture to be treated. For if they are the kind they say, they will act as how they want to be treated. so lay back…see how he/she treets you…and act accordingly… so in this case, you dont feel deprived and neither will the other party

Sad to say, for a guy I am hopelessly romantic. I try to give the best that I can offer to my partners. However, its been tried and tested that it doesnt seem to work that way. Cos some people just cannot treasure the things you do for them.Maybe they need more time to realise…or maybe their ego’s like that, BUT you have to take effort in confirming and not just give up. Im speaking in general of course. I believe in the concept of soulmate. That there is someone out there made for me. However, soulmates are humans as well. if you dont work out the relationship, things will end eventually. You are not so lucky as too marry that soulmate without any test.For I believe, God do not just give things that precious that easily. You have to go thru lots of hardships and tests…to know for certain whether he/she is the one. A relationship without flaws is fake. For nothing is perfect in this world. I kinda interviewed and studied a few marriages and relationships…and none of the sustaining ones manage to survive so long without fights and arguments. That i believe is the challenge….and at the end of the day….when everything resides…IF the love is strong…things will get better for both.Learn and move on together….

So if your expecting your soulmate to be a knight in a shining armor kinda thing…To be perfect and flawless…to always be full in love w each other….WAKE UP. That only happen in movies…maybe more like cartoons.

Call me jiwang call me silly or say that I am living in my fantasy world.Say what you want…but I am responsible for ME. This is how i am and I am not shy to admit it.

Things that I learn in the past week is to be responsible for yourself. For no one can help you if you are not. And right now, I am taking that responsibility. I am being responsible for my life. No more excuses.

"Judge and ye shall be judge", Abraham Lincon

Welcome To My Life

Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Do you ever feel out of place?
Like somehow you just don’t belong
And no one understands you
Do you ever wanna run away?
Do you lock yourself in your room?
With the radio on turned up so loud
That no one hears you screaming

No you don’t know what it’s like
When nothing feels all right
You don’t know what it’s like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you’re down
To feel like you’ve been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one’s there to save you
No you don’t know what it’s like
Welcome to my life

Do you wanna be somebody else?
Are you sick of feeling so left out?
Are you desperate to find something more?
Before your life is over
Are you stuck inside a world you hate?
Are you sick of everyone around?
With their big fake smiles and stupid lies
While deep inside you’re bleeding

No you don’t know what it’s like
When nothing feels all right
You don’t know what it’s like
To be like me

No one ever lied straight to your face
And no one ever stabbed you in the back
You might think I’m happy but I’m not gonna be okay
Everybody always gave you what you wanted
You never had to work it was always there
You don’t know what it’s like, what it’s like

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I cant believe I wrote that :P

can`t you even see through me? `` Thursday, October 16, 2008

My day started out with a loud bang. It was pouring this afternoon. Well I guess I can't complain about the thunder. It did help to wake me up. So I dressed up as fast as I can and got out.

TALK THE TALK....WALK THE WALK

Often people ask me,

You claim that you do not have any products to sell and you survey the market for the best products for the client. Where do you get your product knowledge from?

Yes true. I don't have any products to sell. I'm a service provider in short. For example, if you want a nice fast food meal, normally you'd just go to either of the fast food outlets. However, not all of the set meals there might satisfy your appetite. What I do is to give you the best that suits your appetite and budget.For example, for the best burger, I'll get you Burger King, fries..Mcdonalds and what about drink? Giant supermarket of cause. Thats what I do. Importantly, clients will not get shortchanged.

Regarding product knowledge, I will have to attend training by the various companies that is in the market. For example today, I had an NTUC Income training over at Brass Basah street. The view from the top of the building isn't as breath taking as that from capitol tower. However, it still captivates me in a way.

As expected from a homegrown company, The Spore Flag

Lovely

After training was done, looking at the lovely weather, I decided to take a walk....all the way to Tanjong Pagar for my appointment. The weather was perfect, It was bright and breezy. Don't you love the weather after the storm. It never fails to materialize. It can be stormy one moment...and the next thing you know, the sun is up again. Its the same with life in way. Everything in this world goes in a cycle. Be it the weather or market conditions. It always goes round in a loop.

Boat Quey

This sight never fail to impress me. In a short period of time, Singapore have pulled through..from a little red dot....to an extremely impressive red dot. Look at us, we have made our mark in the international scene. For this, MM Lee have my greatest admiration. I hope the future leaders of this country can further propel our beautiful country to greater heights. They have the caliber, I know for sure. Let us all keep our fingers crossed :)

can`t you even see through me? `` Thursday, October 16, 2008

10.15.2008

Part of the job scope as a financial advisor is that you are expected to be on the move ( or run when you are extremely late ). I realise that in this few months, Ive taken more busses then I ever did in the past 2 years. By that I mean new service number. Part of the perk that I get also is that I can have time to catch up with friends or do some quick shopping without having to fight with the weekend or evening crowd.

THE F1 BUS

I was rushing off to meet a friend just now and I don't know if you guys have seen this before, but I boarded an F1 bus. No kidding. It had BUCKET seats. I mean The only time i've sat in a bucket sit was in the arcade. Imagine a bus having that. Don't believe me? I have proof

The only thing missing here are seatbelts and a cool driver

Now where are those seatbelts ;)

They even have lane markings!

Check out the back seats..

It was an awesome ride indeed. Although I dont feel like im in a racecar, the experience sure was different. So tell me, have you guys been in one before?

can`t you even see through me? `` Wednesday, October 15, 2008

10.14.2008

Ok ive been trying to find a nice theme for my multiply site. I wish to have a nice black theme but till now, none of them catches my attention. So I decided to have this theme up for the moment.

FACE LIFT

Ok why the face-lift you might ask. Well the previous Naruto theme to me was awesome, however, I'm thinking of making this multiply site as a one stop domain to keep friends and whoever who drops by' updated with stuff about myself both personally and professionally. As I am in the Financial Advisory business, I think this is a good platform to give my professional advise as well as personal advise. This is a service that I am providing to the public..so why not share it here too.

So for the meantime do bear with the current theme. If you have any good black themes to share, please let me know ;)

Take care peeps

can`t you even see through me? `` Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Often a time, people ask me. So bro, what are you doing now. I will answer them that I am a Financial Advisor. The normal reply I get will be... "oh...are you like an Insurance Agent?"

I will smile...and explain to them politely that no...I am not an insurance agent. If you are wondering if I am selling insurance, then I'll have to say, Yes, I do. but if you are equating me to an Insurance Agent, I am not. No offense to the Insurance Agents out there. Its a noble job like that of a teacher and doctor, what can be more beautiful than ensuring that ones family is insured...his love ones financially protected. If Insurance is sold correctly and for the right reasons, then I tell you...it sure is a noble career.

The Financial Advisor
(insurance special)

So then, what differentiate me from the Insurance Agents if I mysely sell insurance? My expertise is to create long term wealth and financial security. And unknown to some, Insurance is the foundation of your wealth enhancement and accumulation.

How so?

Can you insure your job? Yes sure...you are contracted....however, can you ensure on the survivability of your company. Lehman Bros had a long success track record...but over the weekend, It went bust. Such a huge bank, with good credentials and ratings.....going bust. Imagine that. How about AIG. The biggest insurance company in America, with a reputable record, was in the midst of collapsing a few weeks ago and caused major panic. So..what use is a contract if theres no job to work for in the first place.

My point is, anything can happen in life. Be it from market conditions to weather. You can never be so sure what tomorrow might bring you. What if you have a family to feed? Will you take the chance of leaving anything to 'chance' ? To not prepare yourself and the family on any disaster or calamity. Do you have the heart to see them suffer at the expense of your failure to anticipate calamity and manage the risk. Whats the point of saving so much and investing so much if all of that money is going to be pumped into your medical bills in the future due to some critical illness. Come on...we can even die from drinking milk nowadays. Can you guarantee that you wont get any critical illness? or can you guarantee your exact time of death so that you can save enough when you pass on suddenly? Hence I say, protection is the base of wealth accumulation.

But yan, whats the difference between you and the Insurance Agent, you still have not clarify that.

Ok...most people realise that insurance is a need. They are educated enough to realise that hey, I do need to plan for the future and this is one of the means. Its a need. Being under the IFA act, (independant financial Adisory), I am not product driven. I dont even have any products of my own to sell. We here in the IFA give professional advise on enhancing your whole financial portfolio which includes your protection. Some unethical agents sell for the sake of selling. I mean lets face it..if they were doing such a good job in the past, how come people still shun away at the mere mention of 'Insurance' . I'm not saying that all of them are bad, there are the good ones. However being a tied agent, insurance agent can only recommend products under their roof. Meaning to say that their advise is biased to the thing that they have. In the IFA, we can advise on a whole range of products available in the market. In short, clients are receiving wholesome unbiased advise to suit their needs. So in a nutshell, that is the major difference.

Ok, I see your point. But being a Muslim, I dont think it's right to put a price on my own life. I believe its wrong. An ustaz told me.

I would really appreciate it if you can share me the name and contact of this ustaz and I would like to consult him personally on what basis he is judging that on. Do not be misled. Insurance is never about putting a price on your head. Its about aiding your finances in times of calamities for example if you become disabled or suffering from critical illness. Imagine an individual who is 40, earning around 5K per month and have a a wife and 2 kids to feed. If he is to suffer from a critical illness in future, he will need alot of money to pay for his medical bills, or if he is disabled, who is to feed his family. In all, his family will be financially strained. What if he pass on? Who is going to provide that 5K for the family? Insurance is there to meet this needs. To help alleviate the financial burden. If Insurance is so wrong, then takaful should be wrong too.

What is tafakul?

In principle, the Takaful system is based on mutual co-operation, responsibility, assurance, protection and assistance between groups of participants. It is a form of mutual insurance (source : WIkipedia).Insurance works in the same way. However, what makes it not advisable (note its not stated as WRONG) for muslims is that it has a grey area to what investments that the insurance company is having. There is no right or no wrong. Its like when a muslim is in doubt of the purity of the food in terms of halal or haram. When in doubt 'jangan was was'. If a muslim is so particular regarding the investments the insurance company is having then I urge the muslim to transfer all his money into an islamic bank. Thats because believe it or not, the money that you put in commercial banks are invested. If not...why would they want to give you the 0.25% per annum. Thats just a minute fraction from the investment profit that they are receiving. So if you reject commercial insurance for such reasons, make a stand, change your bank. If you are so particular on where your money goes to, how about where your money comes from. Are you aware of your company's business partners? customers? are they in any form related to industries that we are prohibited to be involve in or subahat? What more with the new IR. With companies wanting a stake in that lucrative pie. So have you answered all these grey areas?

Insurance is more like ensuring that your responsibility is carried out even if you do not have the means too. Imagine if you have a wife. Does your responsibility to provide for her get discharged when you are disabled or ill? Yes you can go pass on and leave this world..but what is gonna happen to her? Who is going to help her survive?

But Yan...this are all fated.we must accept it..its gods will

Well yea....so try not to eat for a month then. wont you die? Is that gods will as well?

Thats crazy lah.of cos will die what. who so stupid dont want to eat...eat lah.

Then why can't someone plan for the future when he have the means to? Anticipate the calamity. If you fail to plan, wont you plan to fail? Rather than giving an excuse that it is all fate when you are sick and stuck on bed. Why not anticipate it and when such a time happen, you can be happy to know that you have prepared for it. What you do today is the result of tomorrow. True as Muslims we also have to believe in fate. But remember, God gives us a brain to think and actually map out our course in this life. The mother of a child suffering from cancer cant just say that 'oh its gods will, its fate' and let the child die. She will fight on and give her the best meds and make her survive or even get it cured (some patients can survive for a longer period after some operations to remove affected cancerous cells) Will she stop in helping cos she fear that its against fate? I dont think so.

can`t you even see through me? `` Tuesday, October 14, 2008

10.08.2008

Theres this belief that each of us have our guardian angel......to protect us from harm and in general help us in times of need. Well in the religious sense (which I am not focusing too much on) we each have two angels. One for keeping track of our good deeds and the other our sins. Anyways..I call this post,

ANGEL OF MINE

Have you ever had miracles? Or those mysteries that you cant figure out till today. Well I had my fair bit. And sometimes I wonder if I really am that lucky..or theres someone or something protecting me.

The Art Assignment

When I was in primary 4, I had an art assignment which had totally slipped my mind. It was around this time, during raya. When I reached home, I suddenly remembered that I have to hand in this assignment the very next day. The theme was National day if i'm not wrong. Ok...I panicked. So I took out the drawing block and doodled as fast as I could. It was 11am then and unlike now, my bed time then was 10. I was beat...especially after a whole day of 'raya collection'. I didnt manage to colour it. I gave up. put down my pencil and went to bed. The next day, when I woke up, everything was in place except that the picture was coloured. I was thrilled of cause but puzzled at the same time. I asked my parents if they helped me. They said they didnt.

Ok....true they might have told a white lie...thats one of the possibilities. But the way the picture was coloured...and from the fact that they didnt know where I keep my colour pencils, Its hard to doubt them. Oh the picture was coloured 'kiddishly'. As in from the strokes..you can tell.
Years later I learned that a family of 'Jins' live in the same flat that I did then. Maybe their kids helped me out..haha. I wonder.

Flying Fox

I was the biggest Fish in my uniform group back in secondary school. It was CCA day. A busy day whereby all the CCAs would put on a good show to try and ecruit as many freshies as possible. We had flying fox. After everything was set up, we decided to give it a try. Since nobody voluntered, as the leader, I took a step forward. I got on the ledge, grabbed tight to the loops thats hanging loosely across the rope above. Everything looked ok. The rope seemed taut enuff. I know that things were wrong the moment I jumped off. At 4 stories high. I slid down the rope like a meteor. The rope went slack....it was getting too low...at this rate, I'll hit the grown first before I can reach the end of the rope. I closed my eyes...gripped the loops tighter..lift up my leg as high as I could and prayed. SCRAAAPPPP.....my bum kissed the ground and left it as quickly as it touches it. My bum scrapped the ground. My jeans was torn. However I was unhurt. (besides my bum). Somehow I was 'lifted' inches away from the ground. Oh..I forget to mention, there was not enough people on top to actually help pull the rope to make it more taut while I was on it. 2 guys surely wont have the strength to carry the weight of the rope as well as mine.

Gas Gas Gas

I went home one day from school...tired and sleepy. Had a long day. Straight 4 hours lectures and 2 tutorials after that. It was 4 when I reached home. I noticed that the windows were all closed. An indication that my mum have been out for a long time since morning as it was raining heavily that day. After washing my feat, I went to my room. Something forced me to open the window side open. I dont normally do this as it will be too glaring for a nap. Dont know why, I just feel that I need to that day. SO I went to sleep. I woke up around 630pm. I went to the showers, lit up the lighter. and do my thang. Once done, I went out to take a look at the pots on the stove...was kinda hungry. Guess what, the gas was on. For 2hrs plus, Gas have been seeping throughout the whole house! I quickly rush to all the windows and open them wide open. Its a lucky thing that I open my window wide open. I could have died. And luckily, the gas cylinder didnt explode when I lit my lighter.

Ok there are still some incidents to share...but im getting tired....gosh its already 3. So sit back and recall...did you have any miracles to date?

Do you have an angel by your side?

can`t you even see through me? `` Wednesday, October 08, 2008

10.05.2008

Ok ive spent the whole day at home (whats new rite) haha. Ok but this time its different. This time, we have guests...and not just guests..he had guestsssssssss. Have you ever experience the moment wherby you just blanked out...everything around you blurs away...for that moment..that split second, time stood still. (reminds me of the movie cashback) . Its as though you are stealing time...making it stand still. I call this entry

STILL THE MOMENT

I think ive grown a few wrinkles on my forehead from trying my best to control my anger with herman. The kid sure knows how to push the right button. This is why I dont tutor my own siblings. Monitor and supervise yes. Tutor...nah ah ah. I cant do it. I dont noe why...maybe its because I know them..like their style and all and it just wont happen you know. I hope Im not the only one who have this 'syndrome' . Thats because if you look it from another angle, its kinda irresponsible of me..sigh....

What is relativity. In laymans term, "when you are in a boring lecture, time seems to pass by very slowly.However when you are with the gal that you like, it seems to pass by very fast." That is relativity. Time was passing by very fast in the day. Busy running errands and entertaining guests.

They say that chivalry is dead. Is love dead as well? Well right now, it seems to me that it is. Everyones having problems in their relationships, some on the verge of breaking up, others ending what most people would call a happy ever after relationship. If Marriages can break apart, what more relationships huh. Its just so sad. Oh damn. This is so uncool. Ok emo moment pause here.

Yesterday, a friend told me that I am sensitive..so sensitive that i am sensitive of her being sensitive (haha). I thought about it...sad to say I think shes right. Then I went on a full rewind...thinking of how and why im like this.

Childhood

I was alone most of the time when I was young. I was the only child for 10 years. In this time, I was my mums company during the day. And mum being like other normal housewives will watch soap dramas and hindustan. Since there was only one TV then...I was forced to watch it. (cos i wasnt allowed to go down and play). All this thing about being nice...being helpful and all those naive virtues just seeped in i guess. Cos I remember reflecting upon myself after each episode...and i did actually talk to myself then (err weird..i noe). We always want to be the hero I guess. So I copied the hero. Not the valient brave hero from actionville..but those thats from across the bridge..from niceville. That explains alot I guess.

As much as possible I try to suppress this childhood naiveness of mine. I did lots of things. Mostly during my NS days. But that, is for another time. ;)

I fed this blog to my multiply...so for those who read this post from multiply, I dont blog through there. so sometimes, theres a disruption in format or smthing. But thats not the point. I was looking at all the other blog posts of my contacts. Strangely..I was reluctant to read them. Its like I dont want to know...cos its personal. I do know that what I write here..some personal, might be exploited or such. People might view me differently and such. Thats why I try my best not to expose to much of ME hehehe. I want something of me left....left for that someone whom ive yet to know. Its always good to have some mystery aint it ;)

Shit..im starting to sound like a fag. Ok this is not going to be a habit. Lets unpause this still moment. Let reality sets in again......

Hello again world
How are You Doing?

can`t you even see through me? `` Sunday, October 05, 2008

10.04.2008

Its been a while since shes back here in Singapore. And in this few short week, lots have happened. I had my 'moments' with her. Those which caused some pain and hurt. But its for the better. And no people...its nothing to do with US. its just her. Jangan fikir bukan bukan ahhhhhh :P. So i'll call this entry

SOFFY'S SEND OFF RAYA

Friday...lazing around while waiting for herman to finish his practice paper. My hp alarm triggered. 4th Oct 2008 - Soffs Jap. Shit! its tomorrow!! Ok ive been like wanting to meet soff after that incident we had. You know to apologize and stuff and I did promise her that I will try my best to get everyone to see her. Since no one initiated anything (surprisingly) I took the task of organizing. Alhamdulilah, all the 6 of us were able to meet up before her flight. Although it was late at night...and we had things to do the next morning, we were up for it. Thats whats friends are for I guess. As usual, soff will be having food for us. Its pizza! wow. like she knows I was craving for some..haha. So we did our merepek things and talk talk talk. Trying to talk as much as possible and see her as much as possible before she leaves. We will surely miss her.

Famous 6ix
Ain, Fan, Soff, Kat, Osh Yanto

Soff if you are reading this. Do take care yah. Do NOT be naughty aite. ;)

PS : Thank You Osh for driving all the way back. Was too tired to drive.

can`t you even see through me? `` Saturday, October 04, 2008

To most people celebrating Hari Raya, the first day as well sa the first weekend is always the busiest. Well this year...we are breaking that tradition. Our own tradition of trying to visit as many houses as possible during the first week. This is because its crucial time for my brother Herman.

PSLE

His first paper was on Friday. What a way to celebrate Raya huh. Well, the whole family have decided to go through this with him...to stay by his side and sacrifice our Raya outings. I sure hope he pulls through. Unlike Yanti, I am more worried about this fella. He lacks the self motivation and discipline.

Saturday...a day whereby families would wear their beautiful traditional attire, all dressed up for the occasion and ready to go house visiting. How did I spent it? Well..mostly at home.

Mendaki tuition was better than expected. Although there was nothing much to teach..as most of them have completed their exams, I managed to get them do some fun activities. As normal, my approach to the Express kids is different. With them I was more of the 'less merepek' kind. I gave them maths quizzes in the form of magic. After a few failed attempts on mind reading, I went off to IQ quizzes. The rest of the time was socializing with the kids. You see, I believe in wholesome knowledge. Those that goes beyond that of textbooks and exams. The real test is not within the boundaries of the classroom walls....but what is out there. Raw life. Sadly, the education system is not build to cater for this. CCA's does it bit in a way..but its role is so minor. This kids need some form of knowledge to survive out there. True, education is important. However, it is also subjective.

The Normal class as usual gave me some form of strength and energy. Maybe its because of all those kids camps i've been attending via NTUMS and Mendaki. I applied the group building games I learned during the camps to this kids. Getting their interest as well as making them participate as a whole class...which was an impossible task then. I gave them the all time favourite 'what time is it?' game. It made them think..out of the box. Here, I can sense the smart ones, the clever ones, and the intelligent ones. Its amazing, they enjoyed themselves alot. And yah special thanks to those who offered me 'kueh raya' and also to the girl that offered me cupcakes. YUMMY! (names of minors shall not be mentioned) :D

Once home, I watched a show 'Cinta'. The way the movie was made was wonderful. Its more like a film to me. the camera angles, cinematography, script as well as music was amazing. Its a great show.

Needless to say, its about Love. How different individuals...from different walks of life face this mystery called love. Their lives get somehow intertwined...and the transition from couples is smooth. Certain quotes I love includes

" Isteri itu tidak seharusnya di anggap sebagai milik kita, tetapi sebagai Anugerah"
A wife should not be treeted as your property...but as a gift

"Dalam hidup ini, kita sering mengejar benda yang tidak pasti. Namun dalam kesibukkan itu, kita lupa akan sesuatu yang akan pasti memberikan kita kebahagian
Cinta"
In life, we always chase after things that has no certainty. However, in that chase, we forget of one thing that can promise us happiness
Love

In the words of Jason Mraz from his song 'Life is wonderful'

It takes no time to fall in love, but it takes you years to know what love is

So..Have you found it yet???

can`t you even see through me? `` Saturday, October 04, 2008

10.03.2008

Ok...lets kick start things.

I dont have any form of discipline updating my blog as you all may notice. Normally I will make an entry when i'm idling or when i've got time to kill (so free meh). And yes vigilant readers, this is one of those times. Waiting for dad to return home so I can use the car. We are gonna pay soff a visit before her flight back to Japan. Gonna miss that lil bunny. hahaha.

So updates...to all my penin kaki (you know who you are) who is reading this entry. Neelesh ,razak and myself went for a round yesterday, HAHA. Never thought racing cars would be so much fun. So we went home past 3...had a chat with razak about life till 430am.

Life is so full of uncertainties
Its normal to be stressed about it at this stage
This means that we plan our future
Take it a step at a time....don't be hasty
Don't be complacent either.

Those who fail to plan
Plan to fail.

So let us plan

We have finally reach that stage. Standing before the doorway to life...the rawness of life. I have also sense a change in myself. Im more weary of my surrounding, more weary of how I present myself to others. My job played a huge role in this transition I guess. Looks like i'm seeing the results of what I hope to achieve in the short run. True money may not be good here. But the satisfaction, the fulfillment I get...from helping my friends as well as strangers in helping them plan their future.....is priceless. Of cause failure is not an option. Anything that is within my control will be done as expected. I can sense a new direction. No longer am I thinking of slacking...like before.

The time for enjoyment is coming to its end.....its time to box up those baggy pants I guess. Its now a different ball game. And indeed...a different 'attire' is needed.

Those of pants and shirts which I used to hate...oh not forgetting neck ties. bleargh. Discipline is doing things that you don't like to do. Well I guess it starts here

can`t you even see through me? `` Friday, October 03, 2008