1.10.2008



Amal Muharam
A Brand Start to a New Beginning.


*LoveDreams&Pain*

As the week progresses, as time passes me by at an instance, I stop to take a breather, to lenghten the seconds, to cheat time, to stop this Earth all together.
Now everythings in a pause, I stood and observe.
*depressing the REWIND button*
My week started off with a phonecall from the past. It was rather meaningful in a sense. I dont know if she realise why the arguments happen in the first place. Since shes apologising for most of the things she did in the past I hope she understood, why it occured in the first place. Anyways, im Happy for her. I hope she stops making the same mistakes. Cos seriously, It sucks being at the other end.
Have you ever felt as though accurances occur in a pattern, as though a message is being decrypted for you? Well, I came to realise that maybe, im picking up somethings from dad. Analysing and deducing. Ive been accused of assuming( give me a break)....seriously...deducing takes a lot more work.
A strange coincident happened the day after, A strange force just made me not go to my lecture as I was half an hour late. I met Maaruf at the canteen. We sat there for an hour an a half, talking about general stuffs, like politics, Islam and stuffs. It was an eye opener, and at times like this, Id thank god for giving me HIS knowlledge. After the next lecture, I went to the Mussolah( prayer room) for Dzuhur. There was something different about the prayer this time round. I was leading two brothers in the prayers and right after salam, after I was 'istirgfaring', I recited Surah - Alfatihah, slowly, verse by verse, and I started tearing. I always pray to GOD to let him open up my heart n appreciate his verses, I believe at that instance, somthing in me opened up. MashaAllah. The emotional rush that ran across my body. It was unbelievable.

I went to gym later, along the way, thinking about the occurances of the day, trying to see a connection, trying to make things familiar and relateble. I met her brother there. It was unexpected. And I went over and said 'hi'. Watever she said the day before did something to me. And I believe its screwing up my state of mind. I hope it will stop.

As I waited for the new year that Wednessday, the passed year flashed passed me in seconds, of all the things that I did. I felt ashamed, ashamed that I couldnt be that person that I should have been, and it instilled a kinda spirit in me, the awakening.

People say things just happen, Id say things happen for a reason. Lifes like a dynamo effect, one actions leads to another and another and so on. Each decision you make, its step that you take, wil leave a familiar mark, an invinsible pattern to the untrained eye.

*press play*

Sometimes, youd tend to observe more when you slow down. Do we always have to be in a rush? some things just need patience. That brings me to todays picture, LoveDreams&pain

"Many people have this idea that love is supposed to last forever But love isnt like that.Its a free flowing energy that comes and goes as it pleases.Sometimes its stays for life; other times it stays for a second, a day, a month or a year. So dont fear love when it comes simply because it makes you feel vulnerable. But dont be surprised if it leaves either. Just be glad that you had the oppourtunity to experience it" - Joel Kramer, adaptated by Neil Strauss.

That will answer the question why love aint enough. Cos seriously if you are planning to stay in a relationship. Love alone wont sustain it. You need commitment and trust. So if you have yet to realise this, do so now before its too late. Cos if your looking for just LOVE in a relationship, wothout commitment or trust, ur just kidding yourself.

This is me yanto signing off, reminding you of all the little things that you might have forgotten

peace, Wassalam





can`t you even see through me? `` Thursday, January 10, 2008